One of John’s odder unrealized projects was a short diet book, known as either The Invisible Diet or How to Turn Yourself Inside Out. He wrote it in the ’80s under his favorite pseudonym, Randolph Halsey-Quince, and imagined it illustrated with cartoons. Although written in John’s usual humorous style, it offered serious advice: cut out white bread, sugar, caffeine, alcohol, and tobacco; keep track of what you eat; get more exercise. It also recommended changing your eating habits by changing your other habits: read a different newspaper, go to a different church, watch different TV shows. As he put it, “you must change everything.”
Publishers were confused, since it was neither a standard diet book nor a parody, so he was never able to sell it. Here are the first few pages. The “Dachau diet” of the chapter title, by the way, is the starvation diet that was given prisoners — a bad way to lose weight.